How it All Began
by saltwater songs
Summary: CRACK. "Dude, if my life was an anime, it'd be named after me... and—and I'd have an emo past but, like, since I'm the main character, I'd be pretty kickass! Aaaand, we'd all be ninjas... 'cause ninjas rock, yo." It's a wonder what boredom can do to you.


**title: **How Naruto Came to Be  
**summary: **"Dude, if my life was an anime, it'd be named after me... and, and I'd have an emo past but, like, since I'm the main character, I'd be pretty kickass! Aaaand, we'd all be _ninjas... _'cause ninjas rock, yo." It's a wonder what boredom can do to you.  
**pairings/characters: **Naruto and Sasuke... and Kishimoto, LOLLL. (No pairings in this one. ^^)  
**warnings: **this... is utter crack. Please, _please _don't take this seriously. In fact, I'd even advise you not to even _read _this or else it'll make your eyes bleed to death. (Yes, it's just _that _horribly crackish.) **  
notes: **XD I...I don't know. This is based off of a convo I had with my friend.  
**disclaimer: **I don't own Naruto, or Sasuke. Kishimoto owns them, and Kishimoto's _mom_ owns Kishimoto! :D Oh and nor do I own _Bleach, _lmao.

* * *

"Bored, bored, bored, boredddd," Naruto sang, while lying down on Sasuke's bed and reading a manga. "So damn bored! I'm so bored!"

After many years of being stuck with the blond idiot, Sasuke had grown accustomed to Naruto's constant talking, whether it was random babbling to himself, or singing. He had learned to tune out his friend's rambles, and concentrate on his work—which was exactly what Sasuke was doing right now.

Ignoring Naruto's singing slash rambling, Sasuke scrolled down the scrollbar of the internet, scanning through the site, trying to look for resourceful information for his essay. He was still pondering about which topic he should choose, but he was leaning towards the falling economy ("how boring!" Naruto would say). And even though he never really listened to the moron, he was actually beginning to think that perhaps his topic maybe _was _boring—

"Hey Sasuke," Naruto said suddenly, stopping his "boredom" song, and interrupting Sasuke's train of thought as he sat up from the bed.

"What, dobe."

"You know what would be really cool?"

Sasuke sighed. "If you're going to say, 'go to Ichiraku Ramen and see who can eat the most ramen in ten minutes', then no, that would not be really cool."

Naruto scowled at the Uchiha. "That's _not _what I was going to say!"

"Go and steal Kakashi's book and replace it with a nursery book in the cover of Icha Icha Paradise?"

"_No_!"

"Spy on Sakura?"

"NO!"

Sasuke thought for a while, trying to think of the usual suggestions Naruto always suggested would be cool, but before he could finish thinking, Naruto sighed and said, "Just listen to me, damn it!"

So he did.

"It'd be really cool if we were in an anime."

Dead silence.

Sasuke immediately turned back to his computer and went back to researching.

"Hey, wait! Hear me out, won't ya?"

"No. It's already obvious it's just as stupid as your other suggestions."

Naruto glared at him. "You know what, you're an _asshole!"_

"Least I'm not a retard."

"_Bastard, _I'm going to _rip your throat_—"

_Knock, knock!_

Sasuke turned to the door and said, "Come in."

Immediately, their friend, Masashi, came in the room while smiling at the two. "Hey."

"Oh, hey Masashi!" Naruto greeted while grinning widely. "Don't talk to Sasuke. He's being an ass, as usual."

Sasuke rolled his eyes as Masashi raised an eyebrow.

"But hey, you know what would be really cool?" Naruto asked as Masashi drew nearer to the bed and placed his books on it.

"What?"

Naruto paused, to let the suspense sink in, before saying, "If my life was an _anime._"

Silence.

"_What?!"_

"No, no, just listen to this... since my life is so boring right now, I think my life in manga would be much more exciting! Like, for one, we'd all be _ninjas, _and not some normal people... 'cause ninjas rock, yo. And I'd have an emo past, because like all heros need emo pasts, but I'd be amazing and awesome! Yeah! And it'd be, of course, named after _me. _Don't ya think that's kick ass?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes once more at the computer screen, unable to tune out the blond like he was normally able to.

"Oh and Sasuke, that jerk of an ass, would be my _super rival! _He'd act all cool _when he's not!_" Naruto said, obviously louder to make sure the Uchiha was listening. "He'd also have an emo past, hence his emo-present behavior. But like, me, I wouldn't be emo at all! I'd be _me, _'cause _I'm _the main character, for sure. Anyways, Sasuke would then _betray us all _in search of freaking revenge _'cause he's a freaking ass like that!"_

Sasuke whirled around from his chair and glared at the blond. "Yeah right, that's pretty fake and stupid. Like I'd betray you all in search of 'revenge,'" he said while making air quotes around "revenge."

"Hey! Don't dis my anime, bastard!" Naruto shouted. "My anime would be _so damn famous, _people all over the freaking world would be making fanfictions, fanart, fan videos, cosplays—"

"First of all," Sasuke interrupted, "you don't _have _an anime. Second of all, even if you _did, _it would be so dumb and stupid that no one would like it."

Naruto stuck his tongue out at him. "You're just jealous that _I _have my own anime, and you don't!" he retorted, obviously ignoring Sasuke's first statement.

"Actually," Masashi said slowly, "I think that sounds pretty cool..."

Naruto turned to him and grinned widely. "I know, right?! It'll be the top number one manga, for sure!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. _Idiot. _

"And—and, there will be this group of bad dudes that wear black jackets with red clouds on them, 'cause that looks really cool in my mind, and they'd be badass and, oh my God, Sasuke's brother, Itachi, can be in that bad ass group! And Sasu-ass will try and beat his brother up, but of course, won't succeed, and eventually me and all the other _good _ninjas will defeat them all!" Naruto exclaimed. "Man, am I a genius or what?!"

"Try moron," Sasuke said dryly. "Will you stop pretending you have your own anime or manga or whatever? It's stupid and annoying and so damn fake."

"What?!" Naruto yelled. "You never know... I _could _already be in an anime, ya know... hell, this all might even be a _fanfiction _written by some cracked writer called, oh I don't know... clouded memories or something."

Silence.

"Are _you _cracked?" Sasuke asked dryly.

"Shut up, asshole."

"Make me, moron."

"...um, I have to go," Masashi said suddenly, looking a little dazed and preoccupied with his thoughts as he got up and gathered his things.

"Oh, bye Masashi!" Naruto said.

"Bye," he replied.

"Hn," Sasuke muttered.

And as Masashi left the room, and the two resumed back to what they were doing before—Sasuke, back to researching, and Naruto back to reading his _Bleach _manga—little did the two know that their friend was already thinking of a manga along Naruto's storyline of his 'anime' slash 'manga.'

Soon, because of Masashi's friend's ingenious thought, Masashi produced a manga series called, _Naruto, _based on his friend's storyline and became, as Naruto predicted, the number one best selling shounen manga of the century.

The End.

* * *

**A/N: **Er, like I said, COMPLETE CRACK. I have no idea what Masashi Kishimoto's personality is like, lmao, but like... yeah. Like I said, complete crack. xD PLEASE DON'T TAKE _ANYTHING _SERIOUSLY FROM THIS CRACKED FANFIC;;


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